21st SEPTEMBER 2020 As the night goes deeper, my thoughts also sinked with it. You know what the teachers at the high school once said? " Focus on your study right now,dont think about love. You will find the right one once you go to college." Silly thing is that I once ,believe it. Recklessly drop the books in library and find cute guy/girl pick it up for you... Or Study alone in the library and someone is watching you... Cringey isn't? But yeah, that's part of your youth. When getting older ,you will smile at your youth silliness. The moment when you suddenly like someone,the moment you started to chase him/her and the moment you been heartbroken by puppy love. Weird isn't? Me too. I once feel it. Feel the exciting emotion of wanting something/someone to like me back. Like it is not enough to like him/her alone without the mutuals feeling. So here I am ,writing this for those who will read and feel the same as I was (once), you're not wrong. The only thing ...
5thOCTOBER2020 They said, " you can't runaway from your problems." Or " You must feel sad about your bad luck with things,aren't you?" Most of the time,people around me always say something like they actually know the real me or the real things. Most of them, somehow always thinks they ahead of me in thinking about my future life that I dont even know what it is like. One thing for sure, almost all their 'all-known' chit-chat will be gone after a few of days,weeks or months not seeing me. And when they do see me again,it's square one again. Growing up as 'will be a great someone someday' really makes me ....umm. Early mature? I didnt dare to think about my own dreams back then because I'm too focused to be 'someone great someday'. Looking back at those times I left behind, I really had it tough. Like REAL tough. I'm not someone who is smart but I was trained to be one. I'm not born to be strong but was forced to be on...